Speak Kindly to Her

You probably don’t read the Song of Solomon very much, the Old Testament poem that flows with love and romance. While authors express different opinions on the meaning of the text, this much is certain: the man in the story speaks kindly to his wife.

As the years pass, the tone and vocabulary of young love often changes. Not too long ago, compliments and courtesy were predictable communication to her. Now the bride of some years rarely hears thanks for her actions, gentle instruction when she assists with a household task or garage job, thoughtful engagement in a conversation she initiates, or sweet words complimenting her eyes, her hair, her dress, or her character.

Too often the man she loves speaks to her like she is his mom, his sister, or his daughter. He speaks to her with disrespect like he spoke to his mother when he was a teenage boy. He speaks to her with disdain like so many brothers when disgusted with their sisters. He speaks to her with anger like a father speaks to his daughter when irritated by her clothes, her friends, her spending, her driving, or simply for being female.

A man’s words carry the power of life and death (Proverbs 18:21).
A man’s words can turn away his own wrath or stir it up (Proverbs 15:1).
A man’s words can infuse health or suck the breath out of the lungs (Proverbs 12:18).

She’s your wife not your mom. Speak kindly to her.
She’s your wife not your sister. Speak kindly to her.
She’s your wife not your daughter. Speak kindly to her.

As always I welcome your feedback and any suggestions you might have for an upcoming Lunchtime Musing.